I have been writing this post in my head for a while now. I just haven't had the guts to actually write it and announce that I am struggling. (Hence why I haven't posted since April either.)
A lot has happened in the last few months which has led up to my current struggles.
School kept me really busy, but I managed straight A's.
My birthday was the end of May and I turned....30...ugh.
I bought myself a fancy running nerd-bag to hold water bottles and my inhaler, and my husband got my a fancy Garmin 305. I spent a lot of June outside running, but didn't improve my time or distance so I got discouraged and haven't gone on a serious run in weeks.
Needless to say, my eating has been total garbage. I am out of control. If I see it, I eat it. ALL OF IT. In the beginning of June my weight hit my "Scary Number" so I signed back up for Weight Watchers E-Tools so I can track my eating. Since then, I have been excellent at tracking Monday thru Thursday. Then Friday hits....and....all Hell breaks loose. I am not kidding. Two weeks ago, I tracked on Monday the damage I did over the weekend and ended up being 67 Points Plus in the whole. I haven't tracked what I ate this weekend, but let me tell you, it wasn't good. (Friday night was a BAG of Milano cookies, a JAR of salsa with chips, and HALF of a Family Sized Papa Murphy's D-lite pizza.)
The Red line is my "Happy Weight", the Green line is my "In My Dreams" Weight. My current weight is 0.6lbs over my "Goal" weight.
I am miserable right now. I don't know what my problem is and I don't know how to fix it. I used to be the queen of not putting things in my mouth I didn't have the points for. And now it doesn't even seem o matter to me. My pants are tight. I feel gross. And yet, I can't stop myself.
I don't know what to do.
I am scared.
I am struggling.
I need help.
