Monday, August 2, 2010

I found my Blog-Calling at last!

Well, it took lots of thinking and quite a bit of research, but I think I have finally figured out what I will be blogging about from now on!

One big part of my life the last two years has been my weight loss. It was a long struggle but it had to be done.
In June of 2008 I got test results from my yearly check up and found out that I had Insulin Resistant Pre-type 2 Diabetes. That was a scary diagnosis for me. I knew something wasn't right because I had passed out a few times when I went too long without eating. (The most recent one at the time had me seizing with my head on my friends lap, and I threw up orange juice all over her favorite pair of white capris. Not a good day!)

I was totally shocked! I don't know how it happened, but I had gotten FAT!! And getting fat had increased my likely hood of getting full on Diabetes. While my doctor was filling out my prescription of some pill that would help regulate my insulin production and calm my overactive pancreas (or something like that, I don't really understand the medical jargon), I asked her what she recommended for someone like me to do to lose weight and beat diabetes. She said "Easy, join Weight Watchers. It works."

I thought about it for a day or two. Did some research on the Weight Watchers website, and figured I would give it a try. I found a meeting near my house, picked a day and went to a meeting.

When I walked in that door for the first time, I looked like this:

(Okay, not EXACTLY like that, as that was taken at a party the month before! But you get the idea! Those capris were a size 16 and not buttoned or zipped cause they didn't ft.)

And I weighed 210 pounds!!! I cried. Then I read all the materials they gave me, went to the grocery store, cleaned out my pantry and gave my weight loss journey my full attention.
I was lucky and the weight came off really easily and quickly at first. The medicine I was taking helped that a lot as a main side affect was weight loss. I had set a goal for myself to be at my 10% loss goal by my Mexican vacation in December. I worked so hard, counting ever point I put into my mouth and trying to exercise that I achieved my goal a month early! I was very excited! In fact, I was so happy that I decided to take a 'break' from WW (Weight Watchers) and go back to my old ways.
Here I am at 175 lbs:

Flash forward a year and I put back on almost half of what I lost. The pants I bought to fit the smaller me (size 12), were now tight and I was getting grossed out with myself. So, once again, I picked a date and focused myself. I picked a goal of having ALL the weight off by my birthday. I made a spreadsheet and realized that if I lost 1.2 lbs a week I would achieve my goal on time. I wanted to be the weight on my drivers licence which is 150 pounds.

At this point I was doing WW online only since I could not afford to go to meeting due to a pay cut. (Plus I was embarrassed that I had fallen off the wagon.)

I bought a treadmill off of a friend that wasn't using it and she let me make payments. I decided to start following the Couch to 5k program with the intention of doing the Shamrock Run in March of 2010. I ran 3 days a week, tracked every point, participated in the WW message boards for motivation and accountability and I did great!

I was not able to do the 5k as planned due to a death in the family, and to be honest, I wasn't completely ready. We lost my father-in-law Tom on March 12th, and I ate for comfort and stress relief while I helped my family plan and mourn. After my week off plan, I got back on the wagon, and refocused. (On the day of the Memorial Service I was in a size 12 dress, with Spanx to smooth me out.)

I continued to focus on my weightloss and by mid-May I was close to my goal but not going to make the deadline of my birthday. (This is a BIG lesson, for those readers who are still losing weight; Don't pick a date! Just let it happen!) I got a little discouraged, but with support from my online friends on the WW 20's board, I remained focused. (You will notice that I say "focus" a lot. It is a big thing for me. If I am not paying attention to what I am doing at all times, I get distracted and end up off course. Especially while driving!)

When I was about 10 lbs away from my goal weight I decided to go back to meetings for two reasons. #1 being I had heard the last ten were the hardest and I knew I would need lots of support, and #2 (the big one) WW only offers the benefits of Lifetime membership to members that attend meetings. I figured, with the amount of work I put into the program, AND the fact that I would be on WW for the rest of my life, it would be great incentive to keep the weight off, if the program was free! (If you gain 2 lbs above goal it is no longer free though.)

Here I am at 162 lbs just before I went back to meetings (in a size 10):

My birthday came and went, and I didn't make my goal of 150 lbs. I kept doing what I was doing, and didn't get upset. I knew it would happen eventually. The first week of June I ran my first 5k the Starlight Run. It took me 46 minutes and I didn't run all of it, but I went and I did it. And to be honest, I haven't run since. I tried the running thing, and I learned it wasn't for me. I just don't enjoy it. I physically CAN run, I just don't like doing it. I still struggle to find some sort of activity/exercise that I enjoy. (I plan to blog A LOT about that in the future, as I look for something that makes me happy and I actually look forward to doing!)

Mid-June when discussing my goal with my Leader Rene, she realized that for my height the highest weight I could be and still be at 'goal' was 155, which was just a few ounces from where I was at!! I decided to adjust my goal weight to 155 in order to speed along the process toward Free. On June 21st, 2010 I earned my star for goal and I cried through the meeting out of pure joy. Six weeks later on July 19th I achieved Lifetime and was 4lbs under my original goal at 146.6 lbs!!! I sobbed hysterically before I set foot on the scale and Rene had to give me a big hug to calm me down. My wonderful husband came to the meeting and we talked about how my journey affected him and our relationship and it was great to have him there to celebrate with me! When we got home we took these pictures:

Remember this shirt?

Wow, I still can't believe that is actually me!!

So, two weeks have gone by since I earned Lifetime, and it has been a dismal failure! I have gained around 4 lbs putting my at my original goal of 150 lbs (the highest weight I can be at is 157 if I want to still be a Lifetime member). It took some thinking but I have figured out what the problem is and have come up with a solution to fix it.

Problem #1: I stopped going to the grocery store every week. I used to go to the store every Monday before my meeting and pick up what I needed for the week to make fresh healthy lunches and dinners. (I HAVE to eat a banana every morning with my coffee or I just can't get into a good mood!)

Solution: Go to the grocery store every Monday, even though I am not going to a meeting after. Easy to do, and it is an important habit to keep.

Problem #2: I stopped frequenting the WW message board. On the day I posted my Lifetime status, I got a comment from someone warning me to "not start slacking" now that I am "healed". I know she was just trying to be supportive, but it hurt just the same. (It isn't her fault, she doesn't know how terrified I am of gaining every pound plus some back and being a fat, blind, footless diabetic.) I have had difficulty posting on the boards since I achieved Lifetime because I feel like I don't have anything in common with them anymore. I know that I can provide advice and support for those who are just learning the Plan, but what about when I hit a bump in the road? I just didn't feel like they could relate to me any more. I looked for another message board for Lifetime members, but I didn't find one. Then I started looking at my Twitter friends, and some other blogs I follow and they are all people struggling with their weight loss. It got me thinking, what about the rest of us? Who is out there helping and supporting those who have lost the weight and have to work hard, every day forever to keep it off? I only know 3 people who have reached their goals with WW, and I am so proud of them and look forward to hearing how the next steps of their journey go. (I am talking about you h0neyb, Trixie and BitchCakes!)

Solution: This blog!! If there isn't anyone out there talking about what happens after you lose the weight, why can't it be me?

I have a lot of big things coming up in my life that I am really excited about and I look forward to sharing them with everyone.

My next plan for keeping the weight off (besides Tracking, and monthly check-ins at my WW meeting) I am going to be joining a gym to find an exercise routine that works for me. (I was lucky and able to lose the weight with minimum exercise, but that is not recommended and highly unusual.) I want to find a class I can take a few times a week, like yoga or Pilate's or spinning. And in January, I plan on going back to school! (Yes, I will be blogging about non-WW things too!)

I look forward to supporting, and hearing feedback from any readers I find along the way!!

I hope this blog turns into something helpful for me, but others out there who don't know what to do with themselves after the weight comes off!!

**Oh, I almost forgot! I am currently off medication and am diabetes free! Also, I am a size 6!
***Please follow me on Twitter too! @SuperErizzle

1 comment:

  1. I am so stoked to follow your blog! Thanks for the mention :) Can I tell you that losing weight was way easier than this maintaining crap lol. I've bounced back and forth over 2 months with the same 5 lbs since hitting goal. It's scary & I do not want to weigh 225 again. I'm so happy for you girl! Know that people on the boards might not be able to relate with you being at goal, but they can relate in the sense that weight is a daily battle. You're an inspiration and I love following you on Twitter!!!